piątek, 5 września 2014

BRAD AND JAKE HAVE SOME CAKE : A Midnight screening fan-fiction!

~A Midnight screening fan-fiction!~

~With love from your biggest fan! 

            Brad scratched his beard gently and looked behind the car window. The parking lot was empty. Nothing but a cold drizzle, but cold in a very pleasant, some would even said pleasurable way. 

        Boy, oh boy! – smiled Brad as he turnoff the camera – That sure was a swell movie we just review.

        It’s sure was! – reply Jake and stretched his back – But no cinematic experience bits shearing  it with your best friend. – he add, as he looked at Jake with a very huge grin. 

        Well hold on to your cap, cause our night isn’t over yet! – announced Brad with large charisma and pull out, a big black bag from behind the sit – I prepared a little surprise just for you! 

Jake face got all puzzled.  

        What could it be? – he thought for few seconds – Oh, well! He is my good friend after all , so whatever it shall be I’ll bet it will be something pleasant. Some would even said quite pleasurable!

        TA-DA!!!! – yelled Brad as he pull out… A BIG STRAWBERRY CAKE!!!

        No way!!! – Jake put his hands on his chicks.

        I’ll made it just for you bud! – said Brad – It took me all morning in the kitchen, but darn garnet I did my best. But, why do you look so sad? – ask Brad as like he rightfully noticed, Jakes face became a little gloomy – Don’t you like strawberries? You always said you enjoy how whenever I smile as I’m blushing  my face starts to look like a little strawberry!

        Yes I did and it’s true, but that’s not the case – replay Jake – You see.. I also made one just for you as well – he said as he pullout a lovely lemon cake from his backpack – I was hope it would be, a surprise but now it’s not as special.

        Oh, come on now Jake! – Brad pat his bud on the arm – The fact we come up with the same idea just make the whole thing only more special! You can eat my cake, I’ll shall eat yours, we make a photo and frame it on the wall. Just like in old days!

        Why golly you right! – laugh Jake who felt  a lot more confident and two friends started digging into their tasty treats.

        It’s so amazing you remember how much I’ll love lemon cakes – said Brad after, a while with his mouth full of yummy goodness – But then again everybody knows that  nobody is, a bigger cake lover then The Cinema Snob!

         Who’s that? – ask Jake.

        Who’s who? – Replay Brad.

        That Cinema fellow you mentioned.

        Well, you know… The Cinema Snob? – replay Brad but Jake only got more confuse trying to figure out what his friend is talking about – My nickname? You know, when I review movies on my show…

        Wha-wha-at!? – Jake ayes got bigger – But we are always reviewing movies together! That’s our special little thing… You telling me you do it alone on your own. Don’t you like our special time anymore!?

        No, no, no… It’s not like that! – Brad comfort his friend – It’s a different show where I review different types of movies. Very old movies in fact.

        Old movies? –  ask Jake – Oh, like E.T. or Alice in Wonderland?

        Kind off. – Brad nod his head.

        I see…  – wispier Jake trying to deal with all this new information.

        But don’t worry – said Brad as he took another big bite of his delicious lemon cake – It’s mostly porn.

        WHAT!? – Jake stared at Brad all in shock.
Iit took him, a moment to say another sentence
 – Now correctly if I’m wrong here Brad, but doesn’t “porn” involve scenes with adult people getting naked!?

        It’s sure those! – smiled Brad all jolly and full of memories – Usually as their having intercourse…

         INTERCOURSE!? – yelled Jake who couldn’t believe what he is hearing – And… And you watch THIS!?

        Once a week – continue Brad as he finished the last piece of his scrumptious lemon cake – Boy oh, boy! That was one fine …

         Don’t change the subject Brad!!! – said Jake as upset and temperamental as he could – How can you watch something this… this… – he try to think of a vulgar word to describe porn but sadly nothing in his vocabulary was appropriate to describe such discussing form of art – I can’t believe a person like You would watched this! Sex – he pause for a moment as he never assume he will ever have to bring up this word in a casual conversation – Sex is a private thing between a man and a wife in sanctity of their house, Brad! You have no business of be watching such sensitive activity! 

        Oh, I don’t worry – smiled Brad – I don’t think they were married.

This was the stroke that broke the camel’s back! Jake quickly unlocked his sit belt and opened the door ready to march out. 

        Oh, come on man! – Brad grabbed Jakes hand – Don’t be like that. You know some porn can be quite pleasant. Some would even say…

        LET ME GO!!! – yelled Jake very loud hoping he will get attention of some police officer strewing nearby.
Sadly he didn’t.

        I won’t spent another minute in one car, let alone room with, a person who would stood so low to watch something as despicable as porn from either entertainment, profit or especially pleasure! Now I’m beginning to have my doubts about seeing that “Caligula” movie  you brining up every one a while!  

        Now you’re being rude! – replay Brad who started losing his usual happy-go-lucky charisma – And after all that hard work I put in making your cake just right! To thing I was planning to make you a chocolate one for tomorrow!

Jillian who was sitting in the back sit all this time raise her eyebrows.

        You must understand I have my moral standards! – continue Jake as he sit down next to Brad again – Remember when I was so angry at those Smurfs movies? Now those films may have some flaws here and there, but as a mature adult I would never got so upset about something as silly as a movie intended for children. No! The REAL reason why I got so displease is because those Smurfs where shirtless for the entire screen time! Can you imagine what negative effect could that have on minds of young girls or boys? That’s just aint right! – he hit his leg with his right fist.

        Look I’m sorry I didn’t told you about my show – said Brad – and I complete understand why you would get upset about Me spending all this time watching porn rather than spending time with you. But we were having such wonderful night up to this point. Let’s not fight… you’re my best friend!    

        Fine – said Jake – I’m sorry I rise my voice. But you have to promise me, from now on : No more porn!

        I’ll promise – Brad cross his hearth –I’ll shall never gaze my eyes on another porn film just for the sake of our treasured friendship! Just let me watch this one last film tonight. I’ll already promise people I’ll review it.. We can watch it together.

        Very well – sigh Jake – But you have to promise to tell me you tell when the part whenever ladies start to get naked is coming up so I can leave the room.

        Oh, don’t worry – smiled Brad with a very big grin – This porno is male on male only! – he said , but before he manage to add anything else Jake was already running away through the parking lot.



Maciej Kur

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